Where There Is Hope There Is Joy

I have noticed that when I have hope I'm always filled with joy.  Because of late that I have hope that I'll create a baby, and a take home one if I'm lucky, I'm filled with the joy that just spills over into other areas of my life.

I'm feeling love.  I'm giving love.  I smile more.  Now I have a chance.

For those that were curious as to my E2 numbers on Friday, I found out last night for you.  I really had forgotten to ask about the E2 given the state of the follicles as they are more important when it comes down to it.  But my E2 as of Friday after 4 days of stims were 1900, we didn't check it on Saturday.

Yesterday was my last Lupron shot.  I administered it to myself.  J gave me the IM HCG last night.  Of course the required test was positive this morning.  I have hope that it won't be the only positive one before the beta.

Oh yes, I'm going to POAS before the Beta.  I want to know if I have something growing in there.

Tomorrow at 0730 hrs is the egg retrieval.  We will be doing a three day transfer due to my age.  I was hoping that maybe we'd get to 5 days but Dr. C. thinks 3 days with the assisted hatching will be fine.

So I have hope that I will have enough to get one embryo to stay put this time.

Oh and because I do have hope I bought the above bead for my bracelet today.  I have so much hope that J and I were talking about a second child using donor eggs next time.  It would still be his biologically and a half to our one we created together.  I'm fine with that.  My clock would get reset.  I wouldn't need the stim shots either which is a bonus.

This will be our last IVF with my eggs.  With my estrogen counts this high after just four days of stims I'd hate to see how bad it will be next time.

I bought some heavy weight military boot socks for the treatments.  I'm going to use a sharpie to decorate them.  Oh and if I get my husband to remember he'll take pictures tomorrow of the socks on my feet and us together with me in my gown.

Wish us luck.