Friday, March 27, 2015

Combatives Gone Too Far

Every week my husband's unit does combatives.  I think it is a great way to keep on top of that particular challenge and so does he, but only when there are certain precautions taken since this just practice after all.  Yes, I realize that in the real world that those precautions wouldn't be there but there is not reason why they shouldn't be there if it is practice!

Before the combatives there should be a level 2 instructor present and a medic.  If either of those were there they weren't doing their jobs the other day.  My spouse got hurt not once but twice and did tap out but was ignored during the tap out in the strangle hold.  No one checked his injuries.

The 1stSgt actually told him to not go to sick call for the injury.  I told my spouse he should go get it looked at since he was spitting up blood and swallowing hurt.  I've been strangled.  He had to go to dental anyway since he was due.  They took xrays.  He has soft tissue injuries, chipped tooth, and an abrasions inside his mouth.  Oh and yes no one was instructed to bring mouth guards or wear them before the combatives...probably that is against the rules too I'm guessing.

The dentist gave him biofreeze, motrin, told him to hot pack it when he can and drink warm liquids.  He is having a hard time even talking today since his vocal cords seem to be swollen as well.

I think this is a case of the combatives going a bit far in my opinion.  This wasn't just one guy he went up against but two in the combatives and guys the 1stSgt chose for him that were much bigger and stronger too.

Yes I realize that in the real world you can't pick the guy you are going to have to beat the crap out of but yeah um I think his 1stSgt has something against him. If you've been reading my blog you'll have read that in the past there is something wrong with his chain of command.  DH had to fill in for the 1stSgt the other morning at PT for accountability formation and did good enough that I guess the 1stSgt had to find something else to tear DH up on.

Can't wait to get out of here for DH's sake.

Friday, March 20, 2015

Proof She Does Walk

Eily decided to show off for the camera and walk today.  She has been taking steps without help since 7 1/2 months but today she gave her debut in our living room.  So here she is at 8 months 12 days, walking!

Thursday, March 19, 2015

If This is Menopause

If this is menopause it sucks.

I used to wake up in cold sweats from the PTSD nightmares.  But now I wake up in cold sweats and have no energy to boot.

The weight gain.  WHY did no one warn me about the weight gain?  It is as though my thyroid medicine has been thrown in the trash and I'm back to square one but according to the labs the thryoid is functioning just fine.

I'm getting migraines and I'm on topamax.  I thought I had left behind me the world of migraines when I stopped doing all those wonderful hormones to get me pregnant.  Guess not.

So when Eily goes into her screaming fits, yes she has started that phase of life where she screams if she doesn't get what she wants, ALREADY!, my head pounds.  I told J to please come in from from the bbq last night that I couldn't take it any longer.  I was trying to sew together a sweater that I had crocheted her. The headache was bad enough, compounded with her screaming, I sewed a sleeve on inside out.  I just needed a break.  Today I'll sew the buttons on the sweater.

Thank you everyone for your suggestions on how we can find helpers to help out while I'm out of commission.  The truth is that the Army just doesn't pay enough for enlisted to afford even a mother's helper.  I know that Congress makes it look as though they pay the troops a lot of money but they don't.  If I was working they would still base day care costs off of the income we both make not just the soldier's income.  Kind of like welfare program with the sliding scale of fees.  If you make too much you fall through the cracks with your attempt to better yourself.  If you don't attempt to better yourself you can't make ends meet on what they give you to survive on either.  By no means am I trying to compare GI pay to Welfare as the soldiers work hard to get their pay!

One of my friends is a soldier and she pays out almost $600 a month in day care expenses.  That is almost a third of her income.  Crazy!  Then you have to figure in how she still has to buy food and clothing for her child and pay other bills out of the rest of that too besides food for herself.

Fully off the subject again as I can see.  Brain goes off tangent.  Yes well I need help with Eily.  But we can't afford it.  I have no energy.  I feel bad  that I can't run around and play with her.  Wishing I never had the damn surgery if I had known the recovery was going to take this damn long.  It still hurts to lift her. I still bleed every time I lift her.  Mind you the surgery was the 27th of January.  It seems like forever and ever long ago.

Today I go to the pain clinic and Monday I go back to the oncologist.  At least today I go pick up my Tens unit.  My old one died.  My new one is a co-pay of $80 but well worth it.  Hopefully Eily won't yank the cords off the thing while I'm wearing it if I have to pick her up.

Oh and I feel so guilty for having to put her in the play pen so often during the day.  I mean she is safe.  She has her toys.  I read to her.  She has room to move around.  I just feel like she is resenting me for not picking her up as often as she wants.  I pick her up for feeding, diaper changes and for naptimes which are done in her crib.

any advice?

Tuesday, March 17, 2015

Dolce and Gabbanna

Never will I buy Dolce and Gabbanna goods.

My baby is not synthetic.

Thank you.

Friday, March 13, 2015

More Details

All this past week my DH has had corrective action taken against him and most of last week as well.


Well why not!

He did take time off to be with his family.  Time off he earned.  Some of it was in the use or lose part that if it didn't get used soon it would be lost forever to be used.  Plus he is in his window to re-enlist which means that if he doesn't re-enlist all that leave left would be lost when he leaves the service next year.

So yes he was punished for taking time off to take care of his family.

Last week he was put on detail.

This week he was put on detail.

This weekend it is a four day weekend.  But not for DH.  DH has to work tomorrow.  Yet another detail. This one he was Volun-told to do.

Sigh...will it ever end?

Hopefully yes.

DH has high enough line scores for any job in the ARMY...his lowest line score on his ASVAB is a 131.

So DH is looking to make a job change.  He has been to see the retention officer.  Things look promising for DH.  He has to take a BMST (basic math science test) to prove that he is qualified for the job he is looking at.  He has taken the physical and done the blood work.  Just a few more hoops and a few more papers and maybe just maybe he'll get a chance to get out of here and into a new career in the Army.  The one he is looking into is actually one he wanted to do when he was a civilian before he was downsized at his engineering office nearly eight years ago.  Fingers crossed this works out.  It will mean a one year school but anything worth having means a lot of work.  After all DH and I have been through a year is just a drop in the bucket.

Tuesday, March 10, 2015

So Sick

I'm exhausted.

Fourth round of antibiotics.

I woke up in a cold sweat this morning.

Eily is teething.  She is also chewing the skin off of her hands.

This is the second week of sucking it up with DH back to work and no help at home.  I mean no help at home.  DH comes home exhausted and is of no help.  He is argumentative because of the problems at work that my medical leave has caused him.  He can't leave it at the door either.  So he causes issues at home.  I'm about to leave him if he keeps it up and yes I've told him just so much.

Work stays at work for the most part unless it absolutely has to involve the family.  For the most part it can be left at the door.  There is no real need to bring the stress of work into the family or the stress of the family into the workplace.

The bleeding hasn't stopped.  The more I lift the more I bleed.  I know where this could go.  I've read the letter that the doctor, my doctor, has given to my husband's employer if I'm not taken care of.  I could have to undergo more surgery, emergency surgery.  I don't want that.

I need sleep.  I need to put my feet up.  I don't need to be doing housework and taking care of the baby too.  I asked for a break for the weekend and I didn't get it.  I thought for sure that DH could at least give me the weekend off. But no.

Sunday I did four loads of laundry for the household alone.  Bottles, E's laundry, I helped to dissemble the crib to lower it to the lowest level for mattress.

I'm always the first one awake when she cries to attend to her needs.  Why is it that a man doesn't hear his own child's cries?  I mean this is with me taking vicodin, melatonin, and topamax before bed.  I should be knocked out.  But I still get up and take care of her because I hear her.  If I said in a whisper: sex, beer, food or even gun he'd be awake in an instant.

Friday, March 6, 2015

Swallowing My Pride and Sucking It Up Some More

It seems as though because of my Fibromyalgia I need to have a legal guardian.  Well at least according to the new  AR600-20 as of November 2014.  That really hurts my pride.  I mean I thought I was an adult.  I survived a divorce and I had fibromyalgia during that divorce.  I was diagnosed back in 1997 with it.

So yeah I guess my Mommy will have to be my legal guardian.  I just left her a message.  Good thing she is alive and only about six hours away.  Now that she doesn't have Dad to care for she could if need be come down to care for me.  But really I've been sick during deployments before, survived a head cold while taking care of a sick baby with him gone for training,  had a leg in a cast, been in an auto accident while he was stationed abroad for a year and still somehow took care of myself while living alone.  I think my track record shows that I can handle everything but surgery.  If I have to go in for surgery I have numbers listed in my wallet of who they can call on a red lined card along with meds lists and allergy alerts.

I mean I even have a living will and health care proxy.  Yes I even have a will too.  So I guess have a family care plan for myself to prevent the chaptering on my husband going through so they don't kick his butt out is fine.  I mean really why didn't they take care of this back in November?

Maybe it was because we were away for my father funeral?  Or was it because I was recovering from my brother trying to murder me? Or possibly both since they happened the same day.

Well good news, Mom said she be the legal guardian in the phone conversation I just had with her.  Now I just have to wait to here from DH and we'll work on ironing out this with his CoC.

Thursday, March 5, 2015

Quick Post

Third day of sucking it up.

Yesterday I tore open an incision.  It was also infected.  Great huh?

Back on antibiotics as soon as my DH gets the chance after work to go get them.  He didn't get that chance yesterday.

Eily is doing well.  I tore the incision open while lifting her of course.

I've also had to take on the house work again.  DH has no time for that either.

He has had a dressing down for even asking for an extension.

His CO has started the paperwork to chapter him out.  Why?  Well because DH doesn't have a family care plan.

He actually isn't required to have one.  I actually looked it up too.

Q: Who is required to have a Family Care Plan?
A. Generally, all Soldiers who have dependents and are either single or part of a dual-military couple must have a Family Care Plan. The requirement for a Family Care Plan applies to both Active and Reserv
e Component Soldiers, regardless of grade. AR 600-20, paragraph 5-5b, lists the specific categories of Soldiers for whom a Family Care Plan is mandatory. A Family Care Plan also can benefit other Soldiers, however. Although not required to do so, all married Soldiers who have family members as well as Emergency-Essential DA Civilians are encouraged to prepare a Family Care Plan.

We have it already set up in our wills as to the disposition of our estate, and our legal guardianship of our daughter in the event I should become unable to care for her or should we die.  That should be enough.  I guess it isn't enough or perhaps the CO didn't know about this document.  I told DH he needs to bring in the will when he goes in front of the CO tomorrow to show him that we did indeed have something in place already.  Perhaps this will hold him off from filing the chapter paperwork until DH can fill out the not really required paperwork.

That word encouraged should be changed to bullied or threatened in my book from what they are doing to him.

Monday, March 2, 2015

2nd Oncology Follow Up

Still on full pelvic rest.  Was told that I'm still doing too much.  Great.

Ya da Ya da Ya da


No lifting more than 10 pounds
No bending, pulling, tugging, reaching or squatting
No prolonged sitting or standing

Also Pelvic rest for at least 12 weeks

all was written on the note to be given to my husband's employer (the ARMY) when he applies for more leave and explains to them why I'm not allowed to lift our 20 pound daughter as of yet.

It isn't that I like being on sloth rest either.  I'm really fricken sick of it!!!!!  However, when I lift my daughter I bleed.  Yes, I've still had moments over the past few weeks where I've had no choice but to lift her.

I'm getting cranky.

Sure I can make up her bottle, clean her bottles, refill the bottles with water so that they are ready to go when needed.

I can sort her clean laundry from a sitting position on the floor as long as I'm not bending over or sitting for too long.

DH is running out of leave time.  We need to save some of it for court too.  I know I'll have to make an appearance as a witness and so will he.

I lost my key fob to open up the car today.  Some where between the house and the oncologist office.  Rather sucks.  It fell off.  I've had the dang thing for nine years!

My oncologist thought my daughter was so cute and looked so much like the Gerber baby he just had to take photos of her with his cell phone.  So I stood behind him to get her to smile for the camera.  Can you believe that they had never heard of the Cheerios necklace?  She was wearing/eating one while in the office which really helped in keeping her occupied.