Thursday, March 21, 2013

ICLW March

Hello to everyone out there.

A little about me:

43 infertile with high blood pressure and other physical ailments
2 failed  IVFs
Countless failed IUIs

Moving on to donor eggs.  Paid for donor eggs and just waiting for the embryos to be made.
Feel free to become a follower on my journey.  I'm at 98 followers now.

Now for those of you that are interested here is a bit more on what I've been doing.

Yay!  Started spotting last night.  Maybe a new cycle is soon to be here?

I'm learning more about taking back my marriage.  Really I hate to admit it but sex is the backbone of a strong marriage.  Most infertiles have found this out the hard way.

When men are stressed they need sex more because it is a way for them to dump all their stress and start to think more clearly.

Women want men to meet their emotional needs before sex.  But a guy can't do this with a stressed out foggy brain.

Women need to learn to barter with their husband.  Yes this can mean sex too, especially sex when dealing with men.  If we want something done around the house or for him to fulfill one of our needs we can always promise to give him sex.  You'd be surprised at how fast you get what you want from your husband when you make a promise to give him sex.  That might sound like I'm manipulating my spouse but I'm not because he is getting what he wants too.  He is getting his needs met.

When J and I were undergoing fertility treatments our marriage suffered.  I was on so many restrictions that I was miserable and he was miserable.  Last year I spent a total of 6 months on full pelvic rest to include bed rest with limited movements.  NO SEX!

Now that J and I are going through another planned fertility treatment, this time donor eggs we are taking this little break to find our marriage and find what we need to do to meet each others emotional and physical wants and needs.

J and I both realize that I might end up on bed rest during the upcoming pregnancy.  God, please let there be a pregnancy.  With my high blood pressure and other physical health issues I won't be meeting his needs all that often if at all.  That is the reason we are trying to re-connect now.  We know what we will be facing and we want to meet it head on together.

Okay enough rambling. 

Ttc Ivf Fertility Luck T-Shirt (Google Affiliate Ad)   Cute t-shirt with embryos on it  and the saying:  "think positive"

21 comments:

  1. I think it's so wonderful that you two are focusing on your marriage during this time of waiting. Strong partners make strong parents!

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    1. I agree with you. But I have known a few single parents that have done wonderful jobs too. Being an Army Wife means that I too will do parenting alone for long periods of time but of course with luck and lots of prayers my spouse will come home each time.

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  2. Happy ICLW! and good luck on your upcoming transfer, you just got yourself 99 followers :)

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  3. Thanks for the comment. I'll definitely be following your story...I wish you the very best!

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    1. Hi back from ICLW; thanks for visiting my blog. I love that you're focusing on your marriage right now...so many IFers struggle with staying connected and yet are too distracted by infertility to do anything about it. Much, much luck to you on this donor egg cycle.

      ICLW#40

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  4. Happy ICLW! hope this is the cycle for you!

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  5. hi back from iclw!
    i hope that your marriage becomes great and thatll help your moods and pregnancy chances!

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  6. It sounds like you and your husband have been on a long, hard journey. If you're still able to focus on each other's needs in the face of so much stress, well, you must be doing something right. I hope this donor egg cycle is the one that works!

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    1. Still trying to coordinate the cycle with the egg bank. Sighs, this is going to be quite interesting.

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  7. Have you read the five love languages books? It's another good one. It really talks about how to fill each other's needs appropriately instead of doing for them what you want done to you.

    TTC has actually improved my sex life LOL! My husband has never had the highest sex drive. It all makes sense now that we know he has low T (he's also been going bald since his teens!) so I'm hoping it will improve even more once he starts treatment for that.

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    1. I read the five love languages when my spouse was deployed to Iraq. We both learned from that book. I even bought him the five love languages for men and he'd read it whenever he had the chance.

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  8. Yay for ICLW! :) Always praying for you. :)

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    1. Thanks Jen. I'm always thinking of you and praying for you too.

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  9. Hello from ICLW! Thanks for stopping by my blog! Thanks for sharing you story. I hope this cycle works out for you and I am so glad to hear that you are trying to take back your marriage. It seems like infertility takes so much from us as it is so it is good to try to focus on this.

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    1. Having a strong marriage has always been our first goal and some how trying to conceive sucked it off the path for a while. Now that we are back on the right path we are still hoping for God's blessing on having a child.

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  10. I am so glad that you said that sex is important for marriages! There is this weird stigma about not admitting that for some reason. Like if we admit that then it is back to the kitchen for us with no rights to vote! Pretending that sex is not important is silly!

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