Tuesday, June 17, 2014

Wanting What You Have

I'm feeling incredibly blessed today since I'm in my 34th week and still pregnant.  I want to make it to at least 37 weeks before I say okay to letting her come into this world.  I mean I really won't have a choice when she does decide to appear but I can hope to continue to be pregnant for a while longer.

I do have a few problems here in Nirvana land, but I'm trying to look on the bright side and realize that if I weren't pregnant I'd be complaining and moaning about how nice it is for others to just complain about things when they have something I really want.

First off; J is not prepared for this delivery.  Nope not even a bit.  Not because he is going to be a first time dad.  No, it is because he is a procrastinator.  He has yet to even read through the first week of classes in the hypnobabies workbook or listen to even one cd.  How can I depend on him to be my advocate while I'm coping with the pain?  How can I look to him for comfort if he is going to cave on me and let them give me drugs especially when he hasn't even looked at the birth plan?  I'm really frustrated with him right now and have told him that if he doesn't make this a priority in his life for this once in a lifetime event I will ban him from the birthing room because I really won't need his stress dumped on me.  With that said I am glad that I can complain about him because that means that he will be home for the birth of our daughter and I'm thankful for that, really thankful.

Second is when the time come;  hopefully J will be at home.  I won't be able to reach him by cell phone as where he works is a high security area where no cell phones are allowed.  There are work phones but I don't have the number as of yet.  With my dumb luck daylight during work hours is just when I'll go into active labor!  We are trying to work out a system of some sort for just this.  I know I'll need the phone number(s) soon so I can update the admin. paperwork and the OB office in case I have to go in via ambulance.  But he has only one to the outer office that he just gave to me.  Yes, his own office doesn't have a phone hooked up in it yet.  This is going to get really interesting!  But again I'm thankful because he is home here in the states and in garrison at that.

Third; breathing would be nice.  I would just love it if baby girl would get off my lungs.  I can bend over still.  I can pick things up off the floor.  I can still wear shoes that tie and tie them myself.  But I'd love it if the lungs didn't have so much pressure on them.  I am thankful that I can complain about this, if I didn't complain about this I'd be complaining how lucky some pregnant chic is to be able to complain about it.

So yes I want what I have.  I don't wan the pregnancy to end early.  I'm not wishing it would  either even with all the discomforts that have come with it.  Yes, I'm ready to meet my daughter but in good time.  For now I will continue to get her clothing ready, work on her scrapbook, read adult books while I still can and work on a blanket for her big girl bed.


  1. Sometime soon your daughter will drop further in your pelvis (which will feel really weird and come with its own pains)....then you will be able to breathe!

  2. I can relate to a lot of this post. My son was always squishing my lungs and it became VERY uncomfortable in my 35th week. I believe my body ran out of room because he came at 37.5 weeks on his own.
    Also, I feel like a lot of dad's to be don't do enough preparation. I know I felt ill-prepared for a newborn, and my hubby was even less so. I hope he comes around and starts reading some material. At least a 'what to expect' type thing.
    I am glad you are not wishing your pregnancy away. It's such a blessing to be able to carry a child to term and we should try to enjoy as much as we can of the process because sooner than later, it will be over and we may not get the opportunity again.
    Hope you make it to at least 38 weeks without any major issues.


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