Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Think Of My Future

Last night, after the election votes were mostly in, J and I talked about ending the fertility treatments.  I know that we had a plan on when we would stop but we couldn't remember the date.

Maybe it was the end of this year?

Was it when he ETS's?

I guess we'll have to talk a bit more about it soon.

J is rather annoyed with the outlook for our future.  I know it looks bleak with the economy being so bad.  If he has to leave the service he'll be competing with many others for the same job.  He has already run into problems with his job searching.  Seems he is over qualified for one level but under qualified for the next level up.

Another issue plaguing us is Obama care.  We can't afford health insurance if he leaves the military and has no job waiting for him.  I can't afford to get sick either.  I know that my health isn't good.  We won't qualify for public assistance either.  We are just one of the many that slip through the cracks of a very broken system.

We had hoped that things would have gone differently for us.  We knew that there were infertility issues when we married.  We knew that we would need insurance to help cover some of the costs of treatments.  Without the military medical coverage when he leaves the service all treatments will have to stop.  No donor eggs.  No adoption either.

Seriously who would want to loan money to an out of work infertile couple wanting to adopt?  No one in their right mind.  I mean we couldn't possibly support another mouth to feed.

I'm not putting off job hunting.  I'd like to start looking now but I know for a fact that my income won't be near enough to keep us looking in only one state for J to find work.  We've lived apart for so long already too.  We want to be together now.

I know that if R had one last night it wouldn't save J's job but I wonder if it would have helped the country?  We'll never know now.  Much as Obama has some good points in his presidency he also has a lot of bad ones that make me really fear the next four years.  Sure women's health is a good thing if you can afford the health insurance.  But I can't.  Will I get sent to jail for being uninsured?

Has anyone read this book yet?


  1. You do realize that if you are unemployed or otherwise have a financial hardship the individual mandate can be waived, right?

    And with your husband in the military you will be able to use the VA medical system for care.

    1. Didn't know about the wavier. Thanks for letting me know.

      The VA thing...well if he gets out he'll be able to use it for a while but I won't. He isn't retiring.

  2. I don't want to get into politics, it makes me break out in a rash. I do hope that you and J are able to come to a mutually acceptable decision on your family. I really want to see you have a baby from this iui and then you don't have to worry about all this other stuff.

    1. I really want to have a baby from this IUI too.
      As for rash, well that makes me chuckle because I do have a stress rash on various parts of my body like abdomen and arm from the stress of not knowing if he can stay in. I hate stress.

  3. Take heart. I think more people than not are feeling some of the same things that you are.

    There are so many people who slip through the cracks. Govt assistance is a joke. It doesnt really help people, not with the way that it is currently set up.

    Hopefully J can stay in. Going in to the civi sector is very challenging. Not just financially, emotionally as well.

    Coming from someone who is in the thick of it. It IS very hard. Hoping the best for both of you.

    PS I heard that one woman was able to get her testing covered because she had her OBGYN put in the request. Maybe that is an opition for you?

    1. Maybe it could be an option if I'm able to procure some insurance on the outside.

  4. I would suggest if you have nothing absolutely holding you to the state you are living in to find a state with health insurance. Here in CT they are working at insuring everyone, and there are no bills that they are trying to pass to get service men and women employed in the private sector. Also, fertility treatment is covered by insurance (3 cycles). We also have a lot of industry that is tied to the military and they try to give military personnel credit for training and service. It's just an idea, of course. Things are sucking a lot all over, but it does suck less in some places than others if you can make a break for it.

    1. Hey, good to hear from you again. How have you been?

      Thanks for the information. I'll have to tell my husband.

    2. That is awesome to know! I often forget that life is so different state to state. I am going to let others know of this too!


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