Written Off

A post of venting about my RE clinic.

I know how old I am and I know quite well how old my eggs are too, thank you for telling me yet again.  However do you really think that I don't have much of a chance of getting pregnant considering the fact that I have in the past four times gotten pregnant, the last being earlier this year?

I ovulate on my own.  I'm not telling you I need fertility drugs to get pregnant.  What I'm asking you for is medication to ensure that I stay pregnant once the embryo implants.  I have endometriosis, I know what can happen full well after losing five babies.

Please don't go into telling how much the cost of the Endometrin is since I know quite well it is expensive but my insurance covers it fully and you aren't the one that would have to pay for the medicine.  Why you even suggested and decided to ignore my request and prescribe me the prometrium instead is beyond me.  Thank you doctor for being inconsiderate.  Now I have to find my way up my vaginal canal with two fingers and insert the capsule myself.  Just the very reason why I don't use non-applicator tampons, it hurts!

Thanks a lot for not coming back to my exam room with the semen analysis results.  I really appreciate you not wanting to remove your colleague, who was just chatting with you in the office, so that we could have some privacy for the result.  Giving me the results in the hallway was so professional.

It wasn't enough to insult my intelligence by reminding how old I am but now you decide that just because I have one 16 mm follicle on the right ovary, after you didn't search very hard for the left ovary even though you know it likes to develop cysts that hide behind my bladder, that you won't prescribe a trigger shot this cycle.  Again you deem it not necessary and expensive.  My insurance fully covers the trigger shot too.

IUI would be a waste of my time and money you said since at this point you told me it wouldn't matter.  So you are not saying but left unsaid that you already believe that this cycle is a bust?  Hey doc I hate to remind you but for a gal my age to still ovulate on my own is quite an achievement.  So what if I didn't produce follicles on both ovaries this cycle I did it for two cycles in a row without medication.  I think I'm allowed a slow cycle.  Oh and thanks for not wanting to order a beta in 14 days and telling me to go home and do OPKS.  You want me to use the expensive smiley face ones that aren't covered by insurance well actually none of them are covered.

I asked you when you thought I might ovulate and you had no clue.  I asked what if it happens on Saturday when you are closed.  You just tell me to call SRM and schedule an IUI if I still want one though you don't think it is necessary.

I feel so loved.  End of rant.

I notified Nurse M that I'd like a beta draw 14 days from Saturday.  She wrote it down on a scrap of paper.  Hopefully she'll put it into the computer.  I realize that I'll either have to get it done on the Friday before or wait until Monday.  I'll be testing with HPTs at home.

It is like they just wrote me off.  I really can't wait for Lt.Col.B. to get back.  Even before Dr.C. examined me I told him that I've been getting a lot of pain on the left side.  He ignored me so I didn't bother to tell him that it is hurting after I pee again because he would probably order a urine test to check for a bladder infection of which I don't have.  I've had two of those before.  I won't forget those symptoms.  This feels more like Endo pain.

So this cycle is a bust.  I'll not be celebrating the holidays with at BFP.  My doctor has no faith what so ever in my ovaries and uterus but they won't come out with testing that I need for a possible solution as to why I could be losing pregnancies except to blame it on Endo.  If you blame it on endometriosis you get written off.  I hit the magic number of 42 last year and they started to ignore me then.

Douglas Adams had it right with 42.
I have the question for his answer of 42.

At what age are you written off by the RE?

42!

Forgot to mention it is CD12 and my endometrial stripe is already 9.1, nice and plush!