Friday, November 30, 2012

CD 15 A Little Darker

Today my OPK was a bit darker but still not as dark as it should be.  Maybe tomorrow?

I'm not trying to be depressing but I am realizing that even if I manage to get pregnant this cycle the odds are against me.  Even without having Stage III Endometriosis I have only a 50% chance of carrying to the 20th week.  I've explained all this to J.    To be honest I think my best bet would be not only an egg donor but a surrogate too.

On that train of thought, I know it's bad, but wouldn't it just be easier for my husband to have a fling at this point?  He would still have a child of his own.  I'm not trying to be depressing but haven't most of us just thought about this just once?

If I had a young cousin that didn't mind doing an IUI it would be great but the fact is that I don't have any young cousins.  All are either too old or too young.  My husband has cousins that are the right age but um, I think we'd have to worry about the genetics since it would be his cousins unless it is a cousin far enough out but then again I highly doubt any would volunteer to do something like this for us.  Pregnancy takes a lot out of a woman.  I had a friend volunteer her eggs two years back but her BMI puts her way above the allowable limits to make it safe for her.  Plus now she is over 35 herself.

But I can dream that I'll get pregnant this cycle, stay pregnant long enough to have a viable birthing and a child to pass on the: DNA, dreams, hopes,  and learning too?

Come April J will have to pay out of pocket to keep Tricare coverage for both of us.  Before it was more simple.  J was fully covered by his job.  We are learning just how hard this is going to be for transitioning.  I really hope he finds a good job before he leaves the service though he isn't allowed to start working for them until I think they stated 30 days after he leaves the service.

I too need to start looking for work. J will still have two years of reserves he has to fulfill but that won't pay the bills.  So I guess the only thing that I won't have to change is the name of my blog for two more years.  LOL


  1. When did you put the troll comment? I just noticed it! Even month there is an egg, there is a shot at pregnancy :)

    1. I've been getting a Troll commenting and of course I don't have to publish them so I thought it would be nice to warn in advance.

  2. Finiding a job can be exciting! Its all new and you get to meet new people etc. I think that i am going to be very excited once I finish my schooling.

    There is no reason to stop dreaming!:D

    Humm J having a fling COULD be a lot cheaper. So long as the female was willing to give up the baby 100% and not ask for any money. Finding that woman would be very difficult.

    Is J going in to the reserves or are you talking about IRR? IRR doesnt pay at all. :C I wish that it did. I am still in IRR and all that means is that if they call me I have to show up.

    1. We've been discussing reserves rather than IRR of which he has an obligation. Oh I realize that IRR pays nothing and that is why the Reserves is a thought to help cover the cost of the insurance.

    2. It is the same reason that I want to go in. But for a varity of reasons I cant. I hope that they will let J in to the reserves! That would be awesome for you guys

  3. My husband is the infertile one, but I have thought that all I would have to do is have a fling, or purchase donor sperm and do an IUI. :) Our plan was to use our insurance doing IVF, and if that wasn't working for us to move on to donor sperm, and if that didn't work to move on to foster adoption. (we didn't have the money to adopt an infant, either home or abroad). We were lucky that we didn't have to move on to either plan B or C, but I still think of doing emergency foster care quite a bit. We have been sooooo lucky in the insurance department, if my husband's employer hadn't been good with the insurance as they were, we would never have been able to do plan A or B. I hope that J can get in the reserves if it is what he wants to do. It sounds like it would help you guys move forward. I've got my fingers crossed for you guys!


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