Letting It All Hang Out

I weighed myself today.  This will most likely be my own pre-PUPO weight.  Sure I'll weigh myself tomorrow but I have my doubts about losing any more.  However, if the weight goes up or down tomorrow I'll post about it and the FET when I'm up to it and the Valium has worn off.

Tomorrow is the big day. 

Today I weighed in at 210.8 lbs.  Still category 1 Obese.  But my BMI is now 32.9 for my height of 67 inches.

The day I signed my papers at PNW for this FET I weighed 223.6 lbs that morning at home on 6 March.  Some how with all the hormone treatments I've been doing I've managed to lose almost 13 pounds.  It hasn't been easy.

I splurged this past weekend.  My final weekend of being able to eat what I wanted without fear of doing damage to any potential embryo.

In 36 hours I ate the following foods I'll have to forgo or at least in the amounts I ate and we all know deli meats are out of the picture unless hot:

• almost a full order of Papa John's plain bread sticks.
• chocolate ganache
• prosciutto wrapped Gorgonzola stuffed chicken breast in a golden raisin reduction sauce with a side of mashed potatoes
• chocolate covered thick ridged potato chips; the entire 4 serving bag
• potato salad
• Deli turkey breast on whole wheat bread with cranberry cream cheese on it.  It was really good.
• yogurt covered peanut clusters.  Talk about a sugar rush.

So yes I made a pig of myself and gained 2.6 pounds in 36 hours.  I lost it again but I hated the weight gain.  I hated myself for wanting to splurge.  But I knew that I wouldn't be able to touch most of those foods again for quite a while.  I'm not supposed to be eating chocolate because of my GERD.

I'm sure had I not indulged while on the mini holiday last weekend I would have lost more weight.  Oh well.

I'm still giving myself the PIO shots.  This morning I scratched the skin while removing the needle.  That bled a bit.

So there I let my weight, incompetence with this mornings injection and my food addiction all out in the open.

Just so you can guess what I look like, I still look like this:

This is a photo I took of myself just before the second IVF.  I've lost the weight and look like this again being a size 14 again.  Some day I'll be a size 8 again.