Okay hopefully this doesn't turn into a rant but I can feel one coming on.
I'm sure there are many of you out there that will see both sides to this post tonight.
My husband made a close friend while deployed. I applauded this friendship as in a war zone everyone needs a close friend of whom to confide when the chips are down. Now that they are both home where it is no longer a war zone I feel as though this friend shouldn't come first and me last. Sure, sure I know I'm not really coming in last as he still comes home to me each night and never drunk however it seems as though when I'm settling in for some possible cuddle time that is when this friend decides to call and off the husband unit goes. What am I chopped liver?
From the previous post, those that took time to read it will note I was thinking of some fun time tonight if the chance arose. HAH!
After four loads of laundry with a bad back, gardening, and foraging for food for myself today I still managed to keep a smile on my face with the hopes of some alone time with the manflesh. During the daylight hours my spouse decided to mow the lawn, we mow our own front, back and sides unlike a lot of post residents, and of course dig more holes. Meanwhile the Honey Do List has grown and grown. Oh its not big things on the list just small ones. Please hose down the car floor mats of your coffee spills. Please finish the shelving unit. Please pick up after yourself and so on. Hey I'm disabled and can't afford a maid. I realize that he has a job away from home but I'm not the sit-on-my-butt, bon-bon eating, soap watching Army Wife that some soldiers think their wives are; I cook, clean, do laundry, accounting, and secretarial duties most week days. Weekends I want a bit of fun time with my mate.
So last week this friend called and got totally insulted that my spouse didn't want to spend but two hours away from me because I was sick. I have asthma and when I get a bad cough with lots of green mucus production it can mean I'll stop breathing. I had already been taking my rescue inhaler for a day or so when I was too short of breath. The friend cut my spouse off on the phone and hung up. For the past week the guy has been in a snit and has even turned his back on my spouse. Sheesh talk about IMS (irritable man syndrome) throw the guy a cow part already some one, please!
Tonight the friend calls. So my husband left all worried about his friend, like the guy was suicidal or something which he wasn't, but the way the conversation was going one would have assumed he was from what I heard my spouse saying to him on the phone. Turns out the friend just wanted to talk to my husband about why he was upset and wouldn't speak to him for a week. This friend told my husband tonight that normal mucus is yellow or green and its only bad if its red. WTF? Seriously? I've been sick enough that my PA wanted to add another asthma medicine to my daily regime just this week! So he was not talking to my spouse for a week just because my spouse decided it was best to stay home last week Friday to make sure I would continue to breathe on my own.
I have bent over backwards to make my husband's friend feel welcome in our home. I've cooked for him. I've had him stay over three nights. We've taken him out to dinner. Heck when the friend's dad was in town I even invited him over to dinner. I made Sauerbraten that night, a dish that takes three days to prepare.
I think that I've truly put in a lot of effort and I'm putting my foot down now. He's not my friend. He has no intention of trying to be friends with me obviously. Its as though he looks at me as if I were something in the way of his friendship with my husband. I do understand that the friend misses the daily chats, work outs, meals and movie time with my spouse that the last year has given him but my spouse is home now and married to me. Get a life dude. Better yet get a girlfriend and you'll find out that couple time is precious.
I'm at the end of my rant. Thank you for reading. Hope you'll find some humor in the above and a better understanding of what can upset an Army Wife.