Ah the clomid is working over time to mess up my cycle length I can see. I normally have a 24-26 day cycle. I'm not pregnant any more or possibly never was since the two lines I got twice last week could have been a figment of my imagination. The final hpt was negative. The spotting has started. On to the next cycle.
J and I have sat down and discussed more options. He finally spoke up. He is worried about my health. He doesn't like what all these drugs are doing to my body. I don't either. We are talking about only trying for a few more cycles until he deploys and calling it quits. No donor egg cycle. No adoption. Just living our lives without children.
There is no shame in calling uncle when you've done two IVF, numerous rounds of clomid ( I started those when he was in AIT in 07) some with IUI in 2011, and trying natural too. We've done it all for what we could afford. Its now getting to the point that if I don't get pregnant soon I can't see myself chasing after a baby if it even ran into the street. Oh I would surely try but don't forget I often use a cane to walk with; today I used my cane.
So this is where we are going. We will slowly fade away from the fertility treatments and slip comfortably into middle age knowing that we did our best. There is no shame.
I've been looking more into pet adoption and will continue to hold off for a while yet. IF per chance I do have a miraculous pregnancy I want to have a pet free environment. I was and still am allergic to dogs. J has a mild cat allergy, his mom has a bad allergic reaction to cats. I don't want to risk our off spring being subjected to asthma attacks related to allergies. I have them and it not fun.
For now I'm going to concentrate on fixing my health. I have an endoscopy this week at the gastroenterologist office. When I eat my stomach gives me sharp pain. When I don't eat my stomach gives me sharp pain. I'm guessing here, maybe an ulcer since I've had them before. Thank you stressful life.