Thursday, February 7, 2013
Saturday Night Widows
The way I lost my first spouse was devastating. I didn't mind seeing the door hit his ass on the way out but I mind losing him to another woman. Not a younger woman. But she was pregnant.
No, not pregnant with my ex-husband's child either. She was still married at the time to her first husband and pregnant with their second child while carrying on an affair with my spouse.
I had one of those type of marriages that everyone dreads. I had the spouse that mentally and physically abused me, as if the cheating on me wasn't bad enough. When I found out he was cheating for sure, I had my suspicions he was with various women for years, I went to the doctor's office and got myself tested for every known STD.
How did I find out? Well it wasn't bad enough that my own mother knew and didn't tell me. She saw him grocery shopping with the other woman and her young son. It wasn't bad enough that our close friends knew about the affair and supported him while lying to me. The clues were there all along. He worked nights and didn't come home at the end of shift. He would tell me he would be out with the guys for breakfast then lie about where he went. He wouldn't answer his cell phone, not even when I was calling to tell him his mother was in the hospital. I found the final clue while doing laundry. I won't go into details but I will tell you that my ex-husband does not have blonde pubic hairs nor do I. Underwear doesn't lie. I was thoroughly grossed out and confronted him when he got home.
I lost a spouse the way in which I never dreamed; considering he was active duty Army for six years. I lost him to another woman. Karma has its own quirks. The female he left me for, he recently left too. Yes, he left her for another woman, a younger woman this time. My heart does go out to the second wife as I'm sure he tried to control her too. But I can't help feeling that she got a taste of Karma since she knew he was beating me while carrying on her meretricious affair
My life does have a happily ever after. I married again. My husband and I are actively trying to create a family while continuing to grow closer together through the many challenges the Army throws our way. Life is an adventure and it should be lived that way.
This post was inspired by Saturday Night Widows by Becky Aikman. After being kicked out of her widow support group for being too young, Becky creates her own support group with an unusual twist. Join From Left to Write on February 14 as we discuss Saturday Night Widows. As a member, I received a copy of the book for review purposes.