Many of my friends who follow one path raise their children in another and find that it cause conflict at home. My husband was raised in a different faith than that of mine. I was raised Roman Catholic. No longer do I follow that path.
Perhaps it can be blamed on college, being a rebellious teen, or in general just being dissatisfied with the Catholic church's strict views of women. To them we were the sinners and are to blame for the downfall of men. Okay, sure.
I chose to become a Unitarian. I believe in many different religions. I chose to incorporate them into my own practice. Some call me a Wiccan others a Pagan but I feel that my religion is more than that. Its far from being organized. Its personal and with it being personal I can't really put a label on it except for the label of Unitarian.
So when my husband gets back home we are going to begin a discussion on what faith to raise our child in. I know his mom would probably prefer the religion that she knows and brought up her two sons in. My dad would prefer the religion that he brought us up in. My mom, well she would also lean towards Christianity because she is all about the ceremonies from birth through death, but she would understand my choice as long as she gets to make the christening gown. I hate to tell her there might not be the "christening" gown but she can call it what she wants and still make one but we get to chose what ceremony its used in.
For my friends out there that are of differing faiths from your spouse and now have children or plan to have children which path did you chose for your offspring?
It's a tough decision and I don't think there's any right or wrong answer. What's right for one person isn't right for another.
ReplyDeleteThat being said, my husband and I aren't big fans of organized religion. He's basically atheist, and I'm spiritualist (I believe in a higher power, but I don't believe in organized religion. I think the message and your relationship with your creator is more important, and helping your fellow man should be a given not a piety.)
Growing up my husband was forced to go to church, I was given free reign. My parents didn't practice anything, and my mom let me try anything out (I went to various denominations of Christian churches, look into Buddhism, paganism, Native American Spirituality)- that freedom I was given was very meaningful for me.
So for us, we are going to let our child be whatever they want. We are going to teach them about morality for the sake of morality, about our personal values, and give them guidance... and go from there I guess.
I know alot of people say kids need to grow up in one particular religion or faith. I decided to let them choose it on their own. I raised my kids with an open mind to religion. I never had one set one for them. I let them go to church or circle when they wanted and be a part of whatever they wanted to do. My girls now understand their is a higher power out there but havent chose one religion or faith they stick to.
ReplyDeleteIt was not that hard for us. Nick considers himself agnostic. Raising our kids to be Jewish was not hard for him. I took him to a bar mitzvah before we were married, and the loved the idea of it. He is very supportive and even is going to help me find a Yeshiva to send my boys to when we have the money down the line. We do the Christmas thing as part of his family tradition, we do incorporate holidays from both sides of the family. We are the only one in my little complex who has a menorah and tree in the same residence. We did take the time to talk about it. When the boys have thier bar mitzvot, they will chose thier own path.
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